Today he thanked me for picking the grapes off the stem and cleaning the light fixtures in the bathroom. He said he notices how hard I work to plan and make nutritious meals. His words will seem insignificant to any other, but to me they are the highest words of praise.
He said that I honor and bless him in so many ways, and my heart aches forlorn. Because I know. I know all the ways I don’t. How I am really undeserving of this favor and even more so, His love.
And when I receive these words of adoration from my husband, I consider Him, the Higher One, the Perfect Love who authenticates every act of selfless devotion, who makes all true love possible and all true love beautiful and all true love true.
I sit in remorse.
The reflection that stares back at me in the mirror? It has too often brushed past others, taken advantage, or given love selfishly. Words of genuine affirmation that are withheld, could they be sin of omission?
I was talking to a lady at church one time and a word of blessing for her life flashed through my mind and I stayed silent. Someone else was standing close by, and I knew their opinion of this woman.
There were people at Bible School, years ago, that I shunned because to offer the hand of friendship would have put me in reproach with someone else.
As hard as it can be to love my husband, it is easy. Uncomplicated and safe.
I sit in remorse because how could my love for him be true unless my love for Him is absolute? And how could my love for Him be absolute unless my love for them is selflessly genuine?
This man that I have gotten? He is fully given over to Him and this man loves others with selflessness that puts me to shame. He would give away his last penny for another man’s need in a culture that calls that kind of sacrifice irresponsible.
I know it in my heart, that no one can live true love unless they know His love. I know that there is no concise way how to live it, because I know that living true love means loving in the Spirit. Waking up every morning and putting on the garment of sacrificial agape, saying yes to the Perfect Love that casts out all fear, that gives uncalculated confidence to the follower of Jesus.
Conversing with strangers on the streets as if we are old friends.
Giving a sweatshirt to a Club girl’s mom, because she loves it and you don’t need it.
Forgetting your agenda for the rest of the day to live present in the moment with the people in the grocery store.
Praying out loud in McDonalds.
I have one friend who brings a cup of coffee to the Salvation Army bell ringer at Christmas.
Our acts of true love look insane because they are.